1. What Is Our Shit? Introducing Kristy & Angie
In this episode, we get to know Kristy and Angie on a personal level about who they are and why they decided to share their personal stories with the internet. We touch briefly on what it was like growing up in East Vancouver, their favourite memory of each other, and their experiences so far in their own mental health journey.
Highlights:
Monkey prostitution (you read that right)
What makes Kristy & Angie cringe
When Kristy gave herself an English name
How to sit
Parenting your parents
What does it mean to be selfish
Takeaways:
Talking about uncomfortable shit gives us permission to untaboo it
Costumes: shit you don't want to talk about internally but pretend it's okay externally
Mentions/Resources:
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Got a topic you want us to chat about? Have a question about mental health or adulting as an Asian American? Let us know!
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Transcript
HEADS UP: We use AI to help us transcribe so we can spend more time on the podcast. The transcription is not perfect. Please forgive any typos. They can be pretty funny though.
Episode 1: What Is Our Shit?
[00:00:00] Kristy Yee:
[00:00:23] Welcome to episode
[00:00:25] Angie Yu: one. Welcome. Welcome.
[00:00:28] Kristy Yee: I'm chewing
[00:00:29] podcasting etiquette.
[00:00:33] Welcome to the first episode of shit we don't tell mom podcast. So today's episode is going to be a little bit different than our planned structure of our future episodes because Angie and I are going to be basically asking each other a bunch of questions,
[00:00:50] Angie Yu: Right. We thought it'd be a good idea to ask each other some questions to reveal something about our personalities.
[00:00:59] Yeah. So that you guys can get to know us a little bit better before you hear about our stories.
[00:01:04] Kristy Yee: So I've written 10 questions. Angie's written 10 questions. We don't know what the questions are. I'm going to assume there's going to be some overlap because I think there's just going to be, there's going to be some like surface level.
[00:01:15] Angie Yu: Yeah. Cause there's some surface level questions and then something probably something random cause we're both super random.
[00:01:22] And then probably something deep because that's, you know, that's the shit of this episode.
[00:01:26] Kristy Yee: Okay. So, we don't know what's going to happen, but we just want you guys to get to know us before we basically spread shit all over your ears Okay. Let's get started.
[00:01:40] Kristy Yee: so question one it's a toughie. What is your name? What is your age and where are you from? I know that's three questions.
[00:01:46] Angie Yu: Okay. Wow. Okay. Already changing the rules here.
[00:01:50] Kristy Yee: Boom. That's how it is.
[00:01:52] Angie Yu: My name is Angie. I am 29 years old and I was born in China, but I spent my formative years here in Vancouver, BC.
[00:02:01] Kristy Yee: Formative.
[00:02:02] Angie Yu: Yeah.
[00:02:03] Kristy Yee: So formal
[00:02:04] Angie Yu: Formative.
[00:02:05] Kristy Yee: So formal.
[00:02:06] Angie Yu: I was born in China. Lived there till I was nine and then spent the rest of my time here in Vancouver. So I would say formative because that's like, you know, puberty. Okay. You go, what is your name? What is your age and where are you from?
[00:02:18] Kristy Yee: Oh my gosh, we totally just overlapped on our first three questions, way to go us. So my name is Kristy. I am 29 years old and I am born and raised in Vancouver, Canada. That was exciting.
[00:02:30] Angie Yu: It is exciting. So I mean, there's a reason why we're the same age.
[00:02:35] Kristy Yee: Why is that Ange?
[00:02:36] Because we went to high school together.
[00:02:38] We did.
[00:02:38] Angie Yu: Alright. Time for a second question . what is your. No, that's your question.
[00:02:42] Kristy Yee: Don't read my questions!
[00:02:42] Angie Yu: That was by accident shit.
[00:02:45] Kristy Yee: Oh my God. We already broke all the rules. We're not even question two in, and we broke This is how we start the foundation of our podcast.
[00:02:52] Angie Yu: Okay. What did you study?
[00:02:54] Kristy Yee: Oh gosh.
[00:02:55] Angie Yu: I know it's a really boring question. I apologize.
[00:02:57] Kristy Yee: Oh man. I thought we're all about not having surface level conversations.
[00:03:01] Angie Yu: Hey, you can make it sound as deep or as surface level as you want.
[00:03:06] What did you study?
[00:03:07] Kristy Yee: I studied a bunch of shit, so once upon a time, I decided to go into hospitality management. So I studied some of that and then, I decided, Nope, don't want to do that. And, I spent the next seven years studying dietetics.
[00:03:22] Angie Yu: Dietetics.
[00:03:23] Kristy Yee: Yup. That's nutrition for the lay people.
[00:03:26] Angie Yu: Yeah. See, I don't use that word in my day to day language.
[00:03:29] Kristy Yee: Well, I have to cause it's my job. Is formative part of a part of your professional jargon?
[00:03:36] Angie Yu: No, it's not part of my professional jargon, but, as you know, I've been talking a lot about being part of the Chinese diaspora, what it's like being Chinese Canadian, and I feel like formative is thrown around a lot when I talk to people, so, yeah.
[00:03:50] Kristy Yee: Got it.
[00:03:51] Okay. what about you Ange, what did you study and where did to go.
[00:03:54] Angie Yu: I studied finance and economics Actually my favorite classes were international economics and international business.
[00:04:02] Kristy Yee: Why is that?
[00:04:03] Angie Yu: I don't know.
[00:04:04] I think it's just a bit more worldly. I just find it interesting to look at things from a macro level. You would think that if you look at things from a higher up perspective, it would make it harder for you to, I don't know, conduct your day to day life, but I find that it's better.
[00:04:21] Kristy Yee: I feel like it's easier or not easier. Sorry, I take that back. Nothing about economics is easy. I find it more. Satisfying to look at things on the macro level because then you're looking at things in the big picture and then you can see like how the whole story plays out and how the engine works.
[00:04:40] Basically, I'm speaking in all these terms that I know nothing about. I know nothing about business and I know nothing about physics or engineering.
[00:04:48] Angie Yu: me neither. We don't need to though. Right.
[00:04:51] No one's an expert. We're all human beings. We're all just here to try to figure life out. And yeah,
[00:04:57] Kristy Yee: I agree with you by seeing things on the bigger level though. But I have no idea what international economics mean compared to regular economics
[00:05:06] Angie Yu: like trade.
[00:05:07] Kristy Yee: Okay.
[00:05:08] Angie Yu: Current accounts, surpluses.
[00:05:11] Kristy Yee: So I think of like monopoly now, like the game from Hasbro
[00:05:14] Angie Yu: Monopoly is actually
[00:05:16] Kristy Yee: Or like Catan. You know, where you're trading resources.
[00:05:19] Angie Yu: Catan is actually yeah Catan is more like macroeconomics . International economics is really just macro. Macroeconomics, you look at the country as a household , if that makes sense.
[00:05:32] Kristy Yee: Cool. I like that. I think that's interesting.
[00:05:34] Angie Yu: Yeah. So supply and demand is micro, but supply and demand kind of plays into everything, into daily life as well. I remember my economics teacher, he was an interesting dude. He was like, I don't want to just teach you economics. I want you to think. Economics. I want you to think everything from the perspective of economics. And I was studying business at the time and I was like, this guy is intense as fuck. And then as time went on and I had to take more finance and accounting courses, I was like, Holy shit, this is so boring.
[00:06:04] And then that's why I did a minor in economics.
[00:06:06] Kristy Yee: At the end of the course, did you end up having these colored lenses where you saw everything in a economic perspective and what does that even mean?
[00:06:14] Angie Yu: Yeah, basically, I don't even know what it means, but I can look at any situation and try to think about it from
[00:06:20] what we know as economics nowadays, right? Because the study of economics is still fairly new. So what the economics that we study is Keynes economics and there are so many different types of econ. , but that's kind of like the best that we have right now. and it's just so high level. Like you can play it into almost anything.
[00:06:38] I mean, economics kind of started off as almost psychology, you know, there's this study that was done with monkeys for behavioral economics, and there was a monkey experiment where male monkeys were given kind of like tokens.
[00:06:52] And they can use these tokens to trade for food. So the female monkeys were not given any tokens.
[00:06:58] Kristy Yee: Well, that's bullshit.
[00:06:59] Angie Yu: And then I don't exactly know what happened. I don't know the details I need to look it up. But you know, audience, please do look up this monkey experiment. It's so fascinating. It was a controlled experiment where the females would only get tokens if they had sex with the male.
[00:07:17] Kristy Yee: No.
[00:07:17] Angie Yu: Yeah, yeah. So at first it was like, it was conducted by the scientists where the scientists would give the female tokens, after they have sex with the the male monkeys.
[00:07:25] Kristy Yee: I only do we fuck up our own society. We're fucking up monkey society now too.
[00:07:29] Angie Yu: Well, I'm pretty sure these monkeys didn't live to see the day. So, but eventually the scientists no longer had to facilitate, the exchanges because the male monkeys then started giving the female monkeys the tokens. So they learn prostitution.
[00:07:41] Kristy Yee: Oh my God.
[00:07:42] Angie Yu: By the way, speaking of prostitution, I am currently naked in my closet because it is so warm in here.
[00:07:49] Kristy Yee: That's not what it looks like. I mean, all the listeners out there can only hear our voices, but we can see each other Ange and I,
[00:07:55] Angie Yu: well, I took my shirt off, so it was just hanging around my neck, but it's so warm in this fucking closet.
[00:08:00] Kristy Yee: That's how it's done. Yeah.
[00:08:01] Angie Yu: Okay.
[00:08:02] Kristy Yee: Next question. What is your goal in this podcast?
[00:08:06] Angie Yu: Whew. Well, ultimately, I think it would be great if we can create this community of people who relate to us, whether they're Asian millennials or not, or whether they're female or not. It's just like a community, right? Like. We tell stories from the perspective of Asian millennial females because that's who we are.
[00:08:26] And we can't speak from the perspective of other people, but we're hoping that our stories can be relatable enough so that we can have a supportive community that comes out of this. And you know, even if we get like three subscribers, which will be my mom and my two sisters, not a real sisters. But even if that happens, I think, this would have been something that we did that would make me really proud. because it's vulnerable. It's diving into something we both have no idea about and we are opening up ourselves. A very vulnerable side of ourselves. And I think at the end of the day, even if we just learn something more about ourselves or managed to heal some of our own trauma, that's good enough for me.
[00:09:08] Kristy Yee: So it's all about opening up that conversation and just being vulnerable and, it's a journey cause we're not experts, right? So we're trying to figure stuff out and we're just gonna do it out in the open, basically. Yes. That's what it sounds like from you.
[00:09:19] Angie Yu: Basically we're here on this journey of figuring things out together and we're just inviting other people to join in on this journey together. Yep.
[00:09:27] Kristy Yee: Yep. My goal in this podcast is very similar to what Angie had said, is to create a community of likeminded people to open up these conversations and, have these dialogues because we don't have them enough.
[00:09:39] We're starting to, and that's awesome. And the fact that there is some. you know, like Asian American, Asian, Canadian presence in media. Now some that is also very, very great, but I feel like it's not enough. And I'd love to be a part of that , movement to not only have more Asian-American, I keep saying Asian-American because like.
[00:10:00] You know, that's the tag, but Asian American and Asian Canadian folks. ultimately I just want to be able to normalize these conversation topics because I find that the more that we taboo something . Okay. . I was going to say, the more we taboo something, the less we talk about it. Which is just so dumb, but like,
[00:10:21] why? Why aren't we talking about it? And the more that we don't talk about it, then we just fucking bury it all inside and then you know. Gets bottled in our bodies, and then one day it could just come out the other way and you just shit all over yourself
[00:10:37] Angie Yu: Yeah basically
[00:10:38] Kristy Yee: and that's not cool, man. That's not cool. why not just talk about it?
[00:10:42] I think if I could get one other person to be like, Hey shit, man, I thought I was the only person going through this. Or I thought I was the only person who had those thoughts and, you know, and, they come up to one of us and say like, Oh my gosh, you totally just put words into what I'm feeling. That would be awesome because then it gives people permission to start talking about these things, right. to feel all these quote unquote bad feelings or ugly feelings. But really they're only bad because we label them as such. And then there's all a stigma around it. I mean, okay. It sounds like it's a huge thing. I just want to be able to normalize the conversation so that more people have permission and feel a little bit more comfortable talking about this stuff.
[00:11:32] Because then at the end of the day, if we all talk about it, then this doesn't become shit anymore.
[00:11:37] Angie Yu: Yeah,
[00:11:37] Kristy Yee: And then we don't have to shit our pants.
[00:11:39] Angie Yu: That's right. We want to minimize the pants shitting and, what helps with minimizing the pants shitting
[00:11:44] Kristy Yee: diapers
[00:11:46] Angie Yu: Well, no, because you're still shitting in your pants.
[00:11:48] It's just pants that's designed for shitting in your pants. But we want to minimize the unexpected pants shitting. We want to be regular.
[00:11:55] Kristy Yee: No offense to the folks who are irregular, enough fiber and waters is pretty good for that.
[00:12:00] Angie Yu: Anyway, this analogy is getting..
[00:12:02] Kristy Yee: Getting way out of hand.
[00:12:04] Angie Yu: Yes
[00:12:04] Kristy Yee: You asked me a question now.
[00:12:06] Angie Yu: Would you say that you're more of the mom or the daughter in the relationship?
[00:12:10] Kristy Yee: Hold up. We're going into the relationship with me and my mom already, and we're fucking four questions into this.
[00:12:15] Angie Yu: Just very, very simply. Just
[00:12:17] Kristy Yee: this is a whole season.
[00:12:18] Angie Yu: Well, yeah, so was the whole shitting thing, but just keep it so that our audience wants more.
[00:12:23] Kristy Yee: Okay. I'm sorry, what was the questions?
[00:12:26] Angie Yu: Would you say that you're more of the mom or the daughter in the relationship?
[00:12:30] Kristy Yee: Jesus Christ. I would say I am more of the mom in the relationship.
[00:12:33] Angie Yu: I kind of knew you were going to say that.
[00:12:34] Kristy Yee: Why is that?
[00:12:35] Angie Yu: Because I think a lot of children of immigrants say that. This is also something I used to think. And I think that it's, a fallacy and
[00:12:42] Kristy Yee: Those are big words,
[00:12:43] Angie Yu: I'm a writer, okay. I need to use my vocabulary. Otherwise my writing will deteriorate.
[00:12:48] Kristy Yee: But that's what writing is for cause then your vocabulary comes out of your, you know, writing. .
[00:12:53] Angie Yu: Okay. I think it's a, myth. Personally, I think it's a myth, and I'm not saying that there aren't complicated relationships out there. But I think as the children of immigrants, we put that pressure on ourselves.
[00:13:04] Kristy Yee: To educate our families.
[00:13:06] Angie Yu: Oh yeah. And I think that kind of ties neatly in with one of our upcoming episodes as well.
[00:13:10] So just hint, hint, Winky, wink.
[00:13:13] Kristy Yee: I think you're right. I do feel like there's always this need to educate, but I mean, like, shit, just. There's so much educational opportunities, man. There's so many things that are different from how they were taught and how we were taught. It feels like it's our responsibility is to get them to keep up with the times, you know?
[00:13:30] Angie Yu: But I think there's a difference between helping your parents keep up with the times versus. Being a parent, I think the fact that you know, your mom worries about you and is naggy and is overly anxious about you, I think that is what makes her the mom.
[00:13:45] This is why I don't want to have kids.
[00:13:47] Okay. Next question.
[00:13:48] question four. Okay. What is one fun fact that you usually don't tell. People that you first meet or people that you don't know very well.
[00:13:56] That's a hard question. Can you go first?
[00:13:58] Kristy Yee: No, because I asked the question. Shit, I don't know. Oh, I have one.
[00:14:02] Angie Yu: Okay.
[00:14:04] Kristy Yee: But, but then I just, I just said it on Instagram the other day, but it is something that. Prior to that Instagram post people didn't know about. Okay. So,
[00:14:14] okay. Fun fact about me that I don't usually tell people aside from that one Instagram post, if y'all listening to this, go find that Instagram post and comment on it.
[00:14:23] Angie Yu: That sounds like a lot of work.
[00:14:24] Kristy Yee: We could have fans Ange come on okay, so one fun fact that I don't usually tell people is that I gave myself the name Kristy.
[00:14:32] Angie Yu: Oh, I think I remember this.
[00:14:35] Kristy Yee: Yup.
[00:14:35] Angie Yu: What's the story behind that?
[00:14:37] Kristy Yee: Okay. Have you ever read the babysitter's club book?
[00:14:39] They're like preteen books. So back in the day before cell phones, were common. To the general public as a nine year old girl, we would love to call each other from our house phones.
[00:14:52] Angie Yu: I remember that
[00:14:53] Kristy Yee: Yes, and we'd love to three way call boys. Did you ever do that?
[00:14:58] Angie Yu: Nope.
[00:14:59] Kristy Yee: Okay. I hope other people have done this. Tell me if y'all have done this. We're nine, you know, we're like mature, and we talk about men, and we'll talk about like, who our crushes are and then one of us will decide to call that crush in a three way call, but pretend that the other person is not on the line.
[00:15:18] So basically you're like a wing woman-ing, your friend.
[00:15:22] Angie Yu: Yeah.
[00:15:23] Kristy Yee: I'm calling a boy for one of my friends and it's a boy that I don't know, cause we go to different schools.
[00:15:29] So this guy is like, who the fuck are you? And I don't want to tell him my name. I was reading the babysitter's club book, and the first book is Kristy's Great Idea. So the book is sitting in front of my face and so the first thing that came to mind was, my name is Kristy.
[00:15:43] Wait, what was your name before Kristy?
[00:15:45] Oh, good question. So my Chinese name is Wynann.
[00:15:49] Angie Yu: I knew it. Wynann, yes, I remembered Wynann.
[00:15:52] Kristy Yee: Yes. So that was a name that I went by in school, and this guy, I finally gave a name. So it seems like I'm an honest person at this point and not some crazy mass murderer. the entire school, the school that I did not go to, all their friends started to know me as Kristy . So then I became known as Kristy
[00:16:09] and how do you say Wynann in Chinese.
[00:16:11] Also a good question because the name Wynann, comes from both Cantonese and Mandarin.
[00:16:16] Angie Yu: Well, yeah, written language is the same.
[00:16:18] Kristy Yee: So usually when folks have Chinese names. It comes from either like your entire name is spoken in Cantonese, and then they'll just do the phonetic, equivalent. Right. Or it will be in Mandarin. But my Chinese name is wing young.
[00:16:32] Which half of it sounds like Wynann.
[00:16:34] Angie Yu: Yeah.
[00:16:35] Kristy Yee: But the other does not. So, he took Wing and he took the Cantonese version of that, and then he took Yun from Mandarin, which is Un .
[00:16:43] Angie Yu: Oh, okay. this isn't even like the Romanization of your Chinese name. It's like,
[00:16:48] Kristy Yee: No, it's supposed to be the English-ized, version of my Chinese name. So it was not even a real Chinese name. It's supposed to be the English version of my Chinese name. So when you spell it it's like Lynn and then Ann. But with a W. So it's Wyn-Ann
[00:17:05] Angie Yu: I actually really liked that name.
[00:17:06] Kristy Yee: as an adult. I really appreciate the artistic ness of it. Right. Cause he took, my name in Chinese split it up into both Cantonese and Mandarin because he felt that both languages were important, and then he combined it into an English-ized version of it, and now that's some creative motherfucking juice in there. , I could not have come up with that. But as a kid, you don't appreciate this shit. Right. So I'm like, nobody could pronounce my name. Fuck it. I'm embarrassed by it. It's Kristy.
[00:17:31] Angie Yu: But Kristy suits you more.
[00:17:33] Yes kristy definitely suits you more, for my fun fact, I can click my tongue really loud, but I feel like I don't want to do that on the podcast.
[00:17:40] So I'm going to tell a fun fact about my name as well. So my last name is Yu. And in Chinese it's, you. Yep. it's obviously not fish, but it is a homonym for fish. And my mom's last name is fan. of course it's not rice, but it is a homonym for rice.
[00:17:57] And because I'm an only child born during the only child policy, my parents were fighting over. Whose last name I should take?
[00:18:05] Kristy Yee: Hm that was an option?
[00:18:08] Angie Yu: Yeah. You can name your kid whatever you want. You, you can name it after whoever you want.
[00:18:12] Kristy Yee: I always just assumed that the tradition would be to take the dad's last name.
[00:18:17] Angie Yu: Yeah. But after the communist period, a lot of traditions were kind of thrown out the window. The real tradition is to name. Each generation according to the clan book, but a lot of clan books were burned during the cultural revolution. A lot of them still exists in a lot of the Southern or more remote, areas because they were a bit further from the central government.
[00:18:40] But yeah, my family's clan book was definitely burned. So after that I was kind of like a free for all. But yeah, so anyway, my parents were fighting over whose last name I get, and then they were like, you know what?
[00:18:51] Maybe we could put both of our last name in her name. And they tried all these different combinations and no matter what they came up with, it always sounded like a dish. The rice and the fish hominym just made it is so difficult.
[00:19:05] Kristy Yee: All you need is some preserved vegetables and then your'e good.
[00:19:08] Angie Yu: Exactly. Yeah, it's a, no matter, no matter what they said, it always done some sort of fish on rice dish.
[00:19:12] And my mom just gave up was like fine, fine, fine. She can take your family's last name. So my last name is Yu.
[00:19:18] Kristy Yee: All because she didn't want you to sound like dinner.
[00:19:21] Angie Yu: Yeah, exactly. Next question. my turn to ask you. okay. This is a pretty simple question. what's, what's your favorite way to distress. Not distress, destress.
[00:19:30] Kristy Yee: I have many actually.
[00:19:32] Angie Yu: Okay. Well, what's your favorite way?
[00:19:34] Kristy Yee: Well, fuck, I can't pick a favorite. It depends on the mood. Depends on the weather shit.
[00:19:39] Angie Yu: Pick one.
[00:19:39] I sing, I like to sing.
[00:19:41] Oh, okay.
[00:19:41] That's awesome.
[00:19:42] Kristy Yee: Yeah. So I could be in the bathroom for hours and hours just saying.
[00:19:48] Singing. Aw,
[00:19:49] Angie Yu: that's nice. I'm tone deaf so I don't sing, but what is my favorite way,
[00:19:54] Kristy Yee: but you do play music?
[00:19:55] Angie Yu: I do play music mostly because I am tone deaf. It's kinda like a, I can do it mentality and playing instruments that don't require perfect pitch. Makes me feel better. Yeah. What's my favorite way to de stress? I would say yeah, probably playing music or just lying on the floor.
[00:20:12] Kristy Yee: Dammit. You can't just take my shit.
[00:20:13] Angie Yu: Okay, fine. I won't say playing music. I, would, it would probably be listening to .
[00:20:18] Kristy Yee: Oh my God. Okay. Well that's fair. Listening to music is like a whole other different experience in like making music.
[00:20:24] Angie Yu: Yeah. okay. Next question. What are, wait
[00:20:27] Kristy Yee: hold up. How to ask me a question.
[00:20:30] Hold on. Should be number five. Okay. Right. Okay. number five, what is your experience?
[00:20:36] That's also a strip club.
[00:20:37] What
[00:20:37] Angie Yu: number five is a strip
[00:20:39] Kristy Yee: club.
[00:20:39] The place on main street, right? The one with the orange awning, people in Vancouver will know what I'm talking about. Is that where you fell down? Oh, no. Clearly you don't remember this place because you fucking fell down the stairs.
[00:20:56] Angie Yu: I remember the fall. I remember the fall very well,
[00:20:59] Kristy Yee: but I'm glad.
[00:21:00] Angie Yu: Anyway. Moving on, ask me question number five please.
[00:21:05] Kristy Yee: Okay, I feel like this is a big question. So , just the first thing that comes to mind, because like there could be many episodes on this one. Okay. So first thing that comes to mind right now, I'll just clear your head.
[00:21:14] Okay. Just like find your peace in your inner self, yes.
[00:21:20] Angie Yu: Oh
[00:21:20] the first thing that comes to mind when I ask you, what is your experience with mental health?
[00:21:29] Okay,
[00:21:30] Kristy Yee: first thing. Dammit.
[00:21:31] Angie Yu: I don't know. It's lifelong struggle. What's my experience with
[00:21:34] Kristy Yee: yeah.
[00:21:36] Angie Yu: I'm still learning about it and I've come to accept it.
[00:21:39] For what it is. I mean, that's going to be our next episode.
[00:21:41] Kristy Yee: it's a very like fru fru answer. But I suppose I gave you a fru fru questions. I should have expected a fucking fru fru answer. Well, that's my fault. I'm sorry everyone.
[00:21:52] Angie Yu: Well, I don't want to give too much away because that is our next episode.
[00:21:56] Kristy Yee: I mean, you can give a little bit, just , like in one sentence,
[00:21:59] Angie Yu: in one sentence. Okay. in one sentence. Oh man. I've been depressed for a long time, but I have always been really good at hiding it and I only came to realize I've been hiding it for a really long time and yeah. And I'm okay with it. I've come to accept myself for who I am and that's my experience.
[00:22:18] Kristy Yee: That is a huge, huge step forward just to be okay with it, just to sit with it, you know? Yeah. So applauds, applauds. Snap our fingers.
[00:22:28] Angie Yu: it's still, it's still, it's going to be ongoing until, as long as I'm alive, but I have come to accept it.
[00:22:35] Kristy Yee: That is a great answer because like physical health, your physical health has like with you forever and so and so is your mental health. Okay. My experience with mental health so mental health has really been prevalent, prevalent. what is the word I'm looking for? It's been in my life for a really long time not just, not just within me, like my own mental health, but I've been surrounded by mental health, challenges cause like my parents both have it. and I've always knew that they were managing it since I was a young age. I was like, whatever. It's just another illness.
[00:23:07] Right. And then, and then growing up, I also went through some challenges and like understanding my own mental health and I'm still trying to understand my own mental health, but definitely at some point in my life, like when I was 13 was when I first 12 maybe. Yeah, somewhere around then was when I first really had like an encounter with figuring out what this whole mental health thing is all about and knowing that I had some.
[00:23:36] Is that the right word? Shit. Now I feel like I'm just like walking on all these eggshells when we're all about, Oh, let's be open and be normal and I'm like, what is the right word? I need to be politically correct before people shit on me.
[00:23:49] Angie Yu: Just be yourself, be authentic.
[00:23:51] Kristy Yee: mental health has always been in my life.
[00:23:52] My dad has had it. I knew he was seeing people for it since I was a kid.
[00:23:56] Angie Yu: I think you mean a mental illness.
[00:23:57] Kristy Yee: You're right. Yeah. So like dealing with mental illness and I'm like, okay. It's just a thing that he has. And then later on, when I was hitting my preteen years, I'm like, Oh shit.
[00:24:06] Like, I got some of that shit too. You know, what do I fucking do about it? Yeah.
[00:24:10] Angie Yu: Right.
[00:24:11] Kristy Yee: Pretty much. That's my, so far, my experience with mental health, but that's where it started from
[00:24:16] Angie Yu: I think that's really interesting that you were so aware of what you were surrounded by at such a young age.
[00:24:22] Because for me, I was the complete opposite, and I didn't find out about my family's history until I became diagnosed. So we have very. Contrasting experiences and, we're going to talk about that in our next episode, so please listen to our next episode.
[00:24:38] Kristy Yee: Just a plug.
[00:24:43] Angie Yu: Okay. Question number six. What are you currently binge-watching?
[00:24:47] Kristy Yee: Oh, the crown. Oh, that is an easy question because I think if you asked me this a week ago, it would have been so much harder because I don't usually binge watch stuff. I don't got fucken time for this shit. Okay. It's COVID season right now, and everybody's at home fucking reading and baking and all that shit, which is all lovely and and dandy, but I got time for that.
[00:25:06] Okay. Anyway, I
[00:25:08] Angie Yu: know last week I was like, Christie, , just watch it. Just watch it. Just watch it.
[00:25:13] Kristy Yee: I didn't end up watching,
[00:25:14] Angie Yu: Oh my God.
[00:25:15] Kristy Yee: I know. Okay, but here's the thing. I logged into Netflix, I'm pressing play. I fucking had like, you know, my drink and like my blanket ready and then it said fucking too many users.
[00:25:25] Please upgrade with $3 a month. Here's a free trial. I'm like, fuck no, I'm using my boyfriends. I am one of them leeches. And then at one point he was like, do you want me to like ask my people like my sister to get off? And I'm like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. That's just, that's just rude. You do not interrupt a girl while they're binge watching shit.
[00:25:46] Anyway, so long story short, I did not end up watching the crown. but I will.
[00:25:51] Angie Yu: So what am I binging? I'm not really bingeing. I tend to watch the same shows over and over,
[00:25:55] Kristy Yee: friends.
[00:25:56] Angie Yu: No, I actually haven't watched friends in office. I don't watch the office.
[00:25:59] Kristy Yee: What, Oh my God
[00:26:00] Angie Yu: I've seen episodes here and there, but I haven't binged it. I am currently bingeing Brooklyn nine nine just because the new season came out.
[00:26:07] Kristy Yee: yes.
[00:26:08] Angie Yu: I've already binged it many times, but I want my Brooklyn nine nine to be on the same level as friends.
[00:26:13] Kristy Yee: that was a deep level
[00:26:14] Angie Yu: well, friends taught me English.
[00:26:15] Kristy Yee: And for the listeners out there, Angie is like a fucking friends trivia, Person if there's a fucking friends trivia out there. Yeah. She's a friends trivia champion. Not because she fucking loves the show because she spent so much time watching the show to learn English. She knows every single little detail that you can possibly know.
[00:26:35] Angie Yu: Yeah. Okay. Next question.
[00:26:36] Kristy Yee: Ah, right. It's my turn. I love how, we were talking about TV and I'm like, no, no, no, no, no. I don't got time to watch TV. And then I start listing all these shows.
[00:26:47] I'm asking you again. Number six. Okay. Okay. Okay. Number six. Okay. So in this show, we're going to be talking all about taboo subjects and we're going to be all vulnerable and shit, right? What is three taboo subjects that you look forward to talking about
[00:27:03] Angie Yu: that I look forward to talking about?
[00:27:06] Kristy Yee: Yeah. you're like, shit, I'm fucking excited. This shit tickles my fancy.
[00:27:09] Angie Yu: I don't know. I don't think I'm looking forward to talking about any of them because we have to be so vulnerable.
[00:27:13] Kristy Yee: Oh my gosh. Okay. Yeah. I have some nerves too, but like most excited, you know what I mean?
[00:27:19] I hadn't realized the relationship stuff. I feel like that's juicy .
[00:27:22] Angie Yu: Okay. Actually, I do know, I'm really excited to talk about, philosophy. I'm really excited to talk about travel. If it comes up,
[00:27:29] Kristy Yee: that's not a taboo subject
[00:27:31] Angie Yu: You're right. That's not a taboo. okay. philosophy. Slash. Religion. Right. That's like, that's the taboo part. Philosophy isn't as taboo. think people usually just end up rolling their eyes at you. yeah. I guess sex I am looking at for to talking about sex.
[00:27:43] Kristy Yee: You know, that is like the most non excited voice.
[00:27:46] Angie Yu: Okay.
[00:27:48] Kristy Yee: Maybe I'm not saying if you want, see, I mean I can get in
[00:27:51] Angie Yu: the mood, I suppose.
[00:27:53] Okay. Well three one, three. Okay. I can't, I don't know. You go.
[00:27:59] Kristy Yee: Okay, so I mentioned sex, I mentioned relationships, and they're different things. So sex and relationships, and I am having a tosser...a tosser. It's because I'm watching the crown . fun fact, a coworker and myself to spruce up our day at work, we've been speaking in a British accent.
[00:28:26] We do not last. We cannot last for more than two hours. Anyways, so A toss up I'm having a toss up between, death or. Asian families,
[00:28:42] Angie Yu: but, okay. WTF
[00:28:42] that's
[00:28:43] Kristy Yee: I think
[00:28:43] AsianFamilies.
[00:28:44] Angie Yu: Asian family is so broad.
[00:28:45] Kristy Yee: Okay. I mean, I don't know. It's just all the dumb shit that your parents do, you know? And the shit that grinds your gears. I suppose.
[00:28:52] Angie Yu: Okay. So you just want to rant about your parents. Okay.
[00:28:56] Kristy Yee: Yeah, I think so. Yeah. I'm fucking excited for that.
[00:28:59] Angie Yu: Yeah.
[00:28:59] Kristy Yee: I
[00:28:59] Angie Yu: mean we can rant, we also want to provide some sort of a solution for people.
[00:29:03] Kristy Yee: I mean like this, this podcast hopefully is not just a rant session about would be not fun for anybody to listen to except for the two of us. The whole point of it is to talk about all the stuff that's hidden. You know, some like. Okay. I was going to say skeletons in the closet, which is really freaky because I'm fucking sitting in a closet right now.
[00:29:23] I don't mean tell all your family secrets, but just to say , Oh yeah, my family, they, they do this stuff too behind closed doors that maybe everybody else's family does. Yeah. And closed doors as well. Right. And that's the thing, right? So much of it, I think at least an Asian family. So not just Chinese, but I think in, in Asian culture, in general, we do things behind closed door because like face, you know, and like family name and honor fucking, it's getting all Milan and shit.
[00:29:54] Angie Yu: Oh, okay. You know what? Okay, I know what I want. I really want to talk about now what I really, really want. I really want to talk about inter-ethnic racism. Or intro into ethnic discrimination
[00:30:03] Kristy Yee: I want to understand inter-ethnic relationship
[00:30:06] Angie Yu: I think it's really tense, especially being a Chinese person because the country is so huge and the history is so fucking long.
[00:30:13] and there are just so many, conflicts internally.
[00:30:17] Kristy Yee: Like within China, you mean like within all the different ethnic minorities?
[00:30:20] Angie Yu: within China, but also like more focused on what we do, like within the Asian diaspora. So like Asian Americans, Asian Canadians, I don't know, Asian Australians, Asian Brit, like the Asian diaspora, the Chinese diaspora specifically because Asia is so huge.
[00:30:34] Right? But the Chinese diaspora, I really want to talk about how kind of like the history of our diaspora and why there's so much. Discrimination between the different, groups For me is specifically when my family moved here in 2000 we received a lot of discrimination from Cantonese people because we weren't Cantonese and the Vancouver population was primarily Cantonese before the arrival of mainland Chinese.
[00:30:58] And there was so much,
[00:30:59] Kristy Yee: there was a lot of hate.
[00:31:01] Angie Yu: There was so much hate and it was, I mean, I wrote an article about this. That's based around, intra ethnic discrimination.
[00:31:08] Kristy Yee: one of your earlier pieces, right? Yeah. It was when I,
[00:31:11] Angie Yu: yeah. When I wrote about crazy rich Asians.
[00:31:14] that's something I really want to talk about because I think it's really not said very much, but I know behind closed doors, our parents are bitching about each other like crazy like our Cantonese parents are complaining about our mainland parents of the mainline community and our mainland parents are complaining about the Cantonese community.
[00:31:30] Kristy Yee: Yeah. Okay. So your top three things is philosophy, religion, and the Asian diaspora.
[00:31:36] Angie Yu: No, it's philosophy. Religion. Okay oh, I know. Sorry. My third topic is female friendships.
[00:31:43] Kristy Yee: Hmm. That's a good one. Yeah. That's a really good one. Cool. So female friendships, philosophy slash Asian diaspora, Chinese again. Sorry. Chinese diaspora.
[00:31:54] And then mine were due to do sex relationships and I almost said Brooklyn nine nine cause that just came in my head. Oh Asian parents.
[00:32:05] Angie Yu: Right. Right, right, right, right. Asian. You said Asian family? Yeah. Asian families.
[00:32:08] Kristy Yee: Slash. Parents. Okay. Yeah. Asian parents. Let's, niche down since it was too broad.
[00:32:13] Angie Yu: Okay. The next question that I have is kind of together, like the questions kind of go hand in hand. How do we meet and what's your favorite memory of us.
[00:32:22] Kristy Yee: Oh my God, I feel like this is a test. I have the poorest memories, so please don't take offense.
[00:32:26] Angie Yu: No, no, no. It's not a test. I just, everyone's memory is
[00:32:29] Kristy Yee: to think, okay, this is how I remember. We met in grade nine. in high school. I think it band class.
[00:32:35] Angie Yu: It was definitely a band.
[00:32:37] Kristy Yee: Was it? Like we didn't meet anywhere else
[00:32:40] Angie Yu: first. Right. We met and you said.
[00:32:41] Kristy Yee: You played the flute and you sat kind of in front and then to the left, a little bit of me in front of me and then, and then left like two seats to the left in the flute section and I played the clarinet.
[00:32:54] So I was in the second row. And you were in the first row. And and then I guess we talked, I suppose that we became friends. okay. Memory. Favorite
[00:33:03] Angie Yu: memory of us or of me?
[00:33:05] Kristy Yee: favorite memory is very recent. It was when I got drunk in your apartment.
[00:33:09] Angie Yu: Ah,
[00:33:10] Kristy Yee: I mean, dude, honestly, I feel like that was, we shared a lot of moments, not just one moment. It was like a lot of moments. And we haven't connected in so many years. So even though Angie and I went to high school together and we've known each other since we were like fucking 13, after high school, like even within high school, we weren't within the same circle of friends.
[00:33:29] we knew of each other and were. Friends, but not like close, close friends. and then after high school, I don't even think we connected.
[00:33:37] Angie Yu: Nope.
[00:33:37] Kristy Yee: And then, fucking, we meet again at what, 28, 27, 28
[00:33:43] Angie Yu: end of last year well, we went to get lunch with my ex crystal mall and then we didn't really see each other again. And then. More recently we decided to have a hangout and then we had all these snacks and alcohol and we were drinking on the rooftop patio, and then, , we got fucking wasted.
[00:33:59] Well, you did.
[00:34:00] Kristy Yee: Isn't that a fucking romance? I got really wasted. Listen to that. Snacks, alcohol, rooftop, you know, the sun was setting it was all nice, you know? So I think that is my favorite memory of us,
[00:34:13] Angie Yu: so my most memorable memory of us was when I came with you to the Burnaby hospital to see your dad.
[00:34:21] Kristy Yee: Oh my God.
[00:34:21] Angie Yu: Because that was an entirely new experience for me.
[00:34:24] And I don't know, I just felt so close to you, like intimately, because we went to the hospital together, like you were letting me see this really vulnerable side of you and this like, you know, it's not, it's not shiny. It's not whatever. It's seeing your dad's sick at the hospital.
[00:34:40] it was just very raw and very real.
[00:34:43] So I'm going to be honest.
[00:34:44] Yeah. You don't remember?
[00:34:45] Kristy Yee: I don't remember now that you're telling me. Yeah. I'm starting to have like a small recollection of it. Yeah. But I, I barely remember that my dad went to the hospital.
[00:34:56] Angie Yu: We were in band class, and then
[00:34:59] Kristy Yee: Was this was this grade 9 wow.
[00:35:01] Angie Yu: Yeah. Wow. Like we had barely known each other.
[00:35:05] Oh my
[00:35:05] Kristy Yee: God.
[00:35:06] Angie Yu: But then you had to go to the hospital. I was either going now in grade 10, I don't remember, but your dad was in the hospital, and I knew nothing about you, nothing about your family. And then you had to go to the hospital. .
[00:35:15] Kristy Yee: And then I remember it, now that you're telling me, I remember, I'm like, I think you offer to come like, yeah, you really?
[00:35:20] Yeah. You're like, I was like,
[00:35:22] Angie Yu: cause you said something about going to a hospital. I'm like, Alone. And you're like, yeah. And I was like, okay, would you like me to come with you? And yeah. And then, I did. I don't know the exact conversation, but I remember us taking the bus together to get to the hospital.
[00:35:35] God, yeah.
[00:35:36] Kristy Yee: That is so fucking emotional.
[00:35:38] Angie Yu: It was such an emotional memory. Yeah. Wholly.
[00:35:42] Kristy Yee: I feel like I repressed that memory probably. Cause I honestly, when I think about my dad and his whole medical history being at Burnaby hospital was not a highlight. because I think there was just so much other stuff that had happened afterwards.
[00:35:55] Right. And so I don't even remember Burnaby hospital at all. But now that you mention it, I remember you offering, but then I don't remember the context of it. Like I don't remember. It was after band class. I don't remember the conversations that we had, but, and now I feel like a jerk. But Holy fuck.
[00:36:10] Angie Yu: No.
[00:36:12] Kristy Yee: It also means I feel like I was always comfortable in being vulnerable with you regardless of what stage our friendship was
[00:36:19] Angie Yu: I don't know. I just felt really inclined to go with you because I'm like. You're so young, , why do you have to go to the hospital by herself?
[00:36:26] Kristy Yee: I mean you are just as young dude. So that is some maturity level there too. It was just like, shit, this girl, I
[00:36:33] Angie Yu: don't think
[00:36:34] Kristy Yee: I want to help her and I want to support her.
[00:36:36] You know? That's, that's showing some character on you as well. So.
[00:36:40] Angie Yu: Yeah, that was my most memorable moment.
[00:36:43] Kristy Yee: No, I'm sweating. Oh God, thank you. Oh my gosh.
[00:36:48] Angie Yu: And you were so brave. Like I remember you weren't upset at all when we got to the house. Like you didn't show it anyway.
[00:36:53] Like you were very, like big girl, like at the hospital. And I was pretty like in all of it, I was like, wow, I can't believe. Like she has to go through so much at such a young age. Oh yeah.
[00:37:06] Kristy Yee: Oh my God. This is
[00:37:07] Angie Yu: so nice direction
[00:37:09] Kristy Yee: that I thought we would be taking in this episode, but Oh shit. I'm feeling all like fuzzy slippers.
[00:37:18] Okay, so that was your most memorable, right. So what's your favorite memory
[00:37:21] Angie Yu: Favourite memory was when you spilled chili in your bag.
[00:37:25] for me like external validation, like I cared so much about what other people thought of me. I still do. And it's one thing that I hate that, not that I hate, but it's one thing that I really want to let go of.
[00:37:35] Kristy Yee: I mean, most of us.
[00:37:37] Angie Yu: Yeah, but you always had this like, I don't give a fuck attitude in high school.
[00:37:41] Kristy Yee: Oh my God. Really?
[00:37:42] Angie Yu: Yeah. I dunno. well, okay, this is not going to sound very nice . I remember when you first transferred and people were like, Oh, like did she see that new girl? Like, have you met the new girl? And some people called you obnoxious.
[00:37:53] Kristy Yee: Wow.
[00:37:54] Angie Yu: Yeah.
[00:37:55] Kristy Yee: I had no idea. Okay. This is juicy.
[00:37:57] Angie Yu: I don't remember the exact people. I'm not just saying this to like protect your feelings or protect them. I legit don't remember who said it. but I never took what other people said as. Concrete evidence until I could see it for myself. when we went became friends, I never thought of you. I was obnoxious. I thought of as more like, I don't give a fuck. I think it's probably because I admired it, like you just didn't give a fuck. and, I used to not like to bring lunch because when you bring lunch people make fun of you. I remember people made fun of one of my best friends in high school for brain dumplings to school cause it's smelled. I cared so much to the point where I just wouldn't bring lunch. So I would rather starve. But anyway, so those favorite memory is the, when we were in B-Wing, and you opened your bag and you saw that your chili just spilled everywhere and your bags felt like Chile. first of all, I was like, who the fuck brings chili to school? you spilled it everywhere and to smell like tomatoes and you didn't even freak out. You just laughed and laughed and you're like, Oh, well and then,
[00:38:51] Kristy Yee: Oh my God,
[00:38:52] Angie Yu: it was soup that you made yourself. That was my favorite bit cause you were just saying like, Oh well whatever. Yolo.
[00:38:59] Kristy Yee: it's so funny to hear from your perspective because I feel like in high school I gave so much fucks about what people thought . I'm like. Cringing but you make it sound like I was like, who gives a fuck? Oh, well. Like life goes on. That will wipe it up.
[00:39:14] Angie Yu: That was the impression I bought. The impression I got was like, you were like, whatever.
[00:39:18] This happens and you just like laughed. I remember you just went with, just kept laughing .
[00:39:23] Next question.
[00:39:23] Kristy Yee: Okay, so I asked about the subjects that you look forward to, but what is one subject that you are dreading, to talk about.
[00:39:30] Angie Yu: I guess I am dreading to talk about sex. It's just such a taboo topic and I've always been the type of person where I don't like talking about it. Not even with my partner. I'd rather just do it
[00:39:41] what about you.
[00:39:44] Kristy Yee: one topic that I dread
[00:39:45] fuck. I had an answer when I wrote this question and now I don't, So I said Asian parents, that's something I was looking forward to. For the rent sesh part of it, but then the whole, let's peel back the layers. Let's get to like the root of it. Let's get to some problem solving part of it.
[00:40:05] You know, that part. let's go into all the details about your relationship with your mom and like , what are some action plans to start resolving that and fix that makes me cringe so hard.
[00:40:18] Angie Yu: I know
[00:40:19] Kristy Yee: I don't want to do any of that. Even though I know it's like healthy and it is the right thing. It is not something fun. At all. It's like waxing. It's like, you know, you're going to feel great and you want to do it because you're going to feel so good about it afterwards. And it's like, you know, healthy cause you're being hygienic.
[00:40:38] And I don't know if it is, but I mean, yeah, you're like cleaning yourself up , but fuck, like the, the, the.
[00:40:46] Action.
[00:40:46] Angie Yu: The process is painful.
[00:40:48] Kristy Yee: It's like, I don't want to,
[00:40:50] I don't want to do that.
[00:40:54] Angie Yu: That's how I feel about talking about sex, huh? Yeah. But you know what? these are all what people in the profession would call costumes. they're costumes of a. Internal issue that you're struggling with. So for some people, maybe talking about sex is uncomfortable because they have body issues, or you might not want to, do that with your mom because there's still a lot of built up, unresolved resentment, you know, it's like the deep stuff.
[00:41:21] The core is really painful and really difficult to talk about. And these are just the costumes sides disguised in.
[00:41:30] Kristy Yee: That's a really good way of putting it.
[00:41:31] Angie Yu: But I'm looking forward to us taking off the costumes.
[00:41:35] I do not.
[00:41:37] Well, I don't either, but like we're gonna do it.
[00:41:41] Kristy Yee: Okay. next question. This one should be easy. Again, this is the first thing that comes to mind. Okay. So like, do not take three seconds. Okay. Okay. Ready? Yeah. What is your favorite place that you've ever traveled to?
[00:41:52] Angie Yu: Oh, yeah. This is an easy one. My favorite place that I've ever traveled to is old Dolly town. Yeah. It's in deep in them province in China. And just getting there is like a journey and once you arrive, it's amazing. what's your favorite place that you've traveled to.
[00:42:08] Kristy Yee: Okay. Definitely Vietnam.
[00:42:09] Just as a country. You could go back in a heartbeat.
[00:42:12] North to South. It's all different, right? The food is different. The climate, , you get mountains, you get rice patties, you get fields, you get like beaches, you have beautiful, gorgeous tropical beaches, and then you get fucking, like, there's this place, a lot.
[00:42:29] It's like the Oakenoggen of Vietnam. I don't know, there's just something about,
[00:42:33] Angie Yu: I couldn't really see the draw of your numb because one thing I really like about traveling within China is going from the big cities to the rural countryside and just seeing how it's like, it's, so for me, like going to the cities in China is like going into the future.
[00:42:48] And going into the countryside is like going back in time.
[00:42:52] Kristy Yee: Yeah, that's, that's so cool.
[00:42:54] Angie Yu: Yeah. Okay. That's a good question. what are you currently reading?
[00:42:57] Kristy Yee: oh no. that's a shame because I'm not reading anything.
[00:43:01] I just finished a book on Saturday. Okay. What did you finish? And I haven't picked up anything. I read. Oh my God. Fuck. I don't remember the title. It's the book from the try guys.
[00:43:11] Angie Yu: Oh, okay.
[00:43:12] Kristy Yee: The hidden, the hidden meaning? No, the hidden.
[00:43:16] Oh my God. No, it's a great title. It's basically about all the reasons why fucking up and failing is a good thing.
[00:43:22] Angie Yu: The hidden
[00:43:23] Kristy Yee: hidden power of fucking up fucking up dude. Okay. So I bought it, I pre-ordered it, and arrived at my house. I read like the first chapter maybe, and then I put it away for months and months and months and then Saturday comes.
[00:43:37] I'm like, fuck it. Let me just like skim through this. So I started from the beginning, cause I don't remember anything from the beginning. And then I read the entire fucking book.
[00:43:44] So you know, it's just a little plug. Try guys. Everybody and I'm sure the try guys will listening to this.
[00:43:49] So big fan over here y'alls, but yeah, that's the last book that I read
[00:43:54] Angie Yu: I'm currently reading like four different books.
[00:43:56] Kristy Yee: What, how do you do that?
[00:43:58] Angie Yu: Because I have no attention span.
[00:44:00] Like some of the best books I've read are the ones that I did not want to read anything else during, but most books, I read multiple books at the same time.
[00:44:07] I wonder if there's a word for it, like instead of monogamy, it's polygamy, but instead of reading one book at a time, it's like reading
[00:44:13] poly biblical.
[00:44:16] Yeah. So I'm reading, how to sit by. . He's a Vietnamese Buddhist monk who, has a series of how to like, mindful excerpts, mindfulness.
[00:44:30] Kristy Yee: give me one, give me like a mindful, exert.
[00:44:32] Angie Yu: Okay. so this excerpt says, when we sit, we bring joy and nourishment to ourselves and to others. Every time we sit, we can sit in such a way that the world can profit from our sitting. We are solid. We are relaxed. We are calm. We are happy while sitting. We sit as if we are sitting on a Lotus flower, not on a heap of burning charcoal.
[00:44:50] Kristy Yee: Okay. I have never put so much thought into fucking sitting before, and I try to meditate every day where you're like, sit on your sit bone, ground yourself. And I'm all about that whole sitting shit. And I've never. Until now. Just that 10 seconds. Thought so much about sitting.
[00:45:07] Angie Yu: he literally has a series. Oh. And how to see how to see what's great. It's about how to see things from a very mindful perspective so that when you. See a flower.
[00:45:15] You don't just see this as a flower. You see the whole life of the flower itself, the fact that we're on earth, there's a, there's a water system that nourishes the flower. There's, , the ground that nourishes the flower. There's the sun, the nurse's flower, because the flower is not a flower. A flower is the result of a whole system.
[00:45:34] And we are part of that system as well. And it's beautiful.
[00:45:37] Kristy Yee: I feel like you are a very big picture person
[00:45:39] Angie Yu: I am. Yeah. It's just perspective. Right? I think that's the thing about mindfulness. It's like seeing things in a perspective that's more whole. . And not seeing you as you, but seeing you as being part of something bigger
[00:45:52] Kristy Yee: don't be selfish cause you are a part of something.
[00:45:54] Angie Yu: and I try to see that from like an anthropological perspective too, because being selfish is there's nothing wrong with it.
[00:46:00] inherently, there's nothing wrong with being selfish because that's how we're wired. We're wired to self preserve, to survive, but you know, we're not animals. We are humans, and that's what makes us different. And we should try to fight those selfish tendencies as much as possible.
[00:46:14] Kristy Yee: what does it mean really to be selfish? Because when you take care of yourself, only then can you take care of others. When you love yourself, only then can you love others, right? So at the end it's like, it's.
[00:46:26] Because you're loving yourself, then you're putting out more value to the community, to the people around you. So is that really being selfish by like wanting to have some time for myself and take care of myself, and I feel like that's not,
[00:46:38] Angie Yu: that's not selfish,
[00:46:39] Kristy Yee: that's not an act of selfishness. So I think it really depends on how people define what selfishness.
[00:46:44] Means. Because maybe at the end of the day, if, if for some people acts of selfishness, it's not actually selfish because in the end it benefits the whole system. It has a greater benefit. It's for the greater good. my Harry Potter reference.
[00:46:57] Angie Yu: No, I completely agree. And sometimes what people think aren't selfish deeds are actually very selfish.
[00:47:03] Like someone who sacrifices their life for a partner or for their family. They're like, Oh. Oh, I'm so selfless, but no beads, because this is what makes them the least anxious, and it is very selfish, you know?
[00:47:16] Kristy Yee: just don't be an asshole, you know? Like, yeah. I feel like that to me is selfish when you're just being an asshole and you're not helping anybody
[00:47:24] you know? Like if you're hurting somebody for your own games.
[00:47:27] Angie Yu: Yeah. That's, yeah, that's definitely selfish when you're, when you jeopardize, other people's wellbeing for your own gain.
[00:47:34] Kristy Yee: Yeah. So like just don't be an asshole.
[00:47:36] Yeah. Basically like, look at the flowers and don't be an
[00:47:38] Angie Yu: asshole. Yeah.
[00:47:39] Kristy Yee: Okay. My next question. Okay. This is also an easy one. What is your favorite food?
[00:47:44] Angie Yu: Noodles.
[00:47:44] Kristy Yee: Okay, but what kind of noodles? Oh, okay. How about this? Okay. How do I say this in English? Because they both say noodles,
[00:47:50] Angie Yu: say in Chinese, see if I understand mean
[00:47:53] Kristy Yee: or fun.
[00:47:54] Angie Yu: Oh, wheat noodle or rice
[00:47:56] Kristy Yee: noodle. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. rice noodle vs wheat noodle, wheat
[00:48:01] Angie Yu: noodle. It's cause you're Southern.
[00:48:05] Kristy Yee: This is where we diverged
[00:48:06] Angie Yu: is because
[00:48:07] for folks who
[00:48:12] Kristy Yee: don't know, she means like Southern Chinese,
[00:48:15] Angie Yu: not like, you know
[00:48:17] Kristy Yee: Louisiana.
[00:48:18] Angie Yu: Yes. Cause you're Southern. There's literally no other explanation. That's just what you're used to.
[00:48:26] Kristy Yee: we do make a lot of shit out of rice. I suppose.
[00:48:28] Angie Yu: I'm kind of in the middle, so I like both, but I still prefer a wee noodles.
[00:48:32] I'm from near Shanghai. I'm from Soochow, so we eat both.
[00:48:37] Kristy Yee: Okay, last question.
[00:48:38] Angie Yu: why did you choose me to start this podcast with?
[00:48:41] so just some background. Christie came to me and was like, Hey, let's do a podcast. And I was like, okay.
[00:48:47] Kristy Yee: And this this was born. That's all it takes, folks. That's all it takes.
[00:48:50] it's not a question I really thought about.
[00:48:53] It just felt natural. I think a lot of it was, I've always been very comfortable with you and clearly through the stories that we share tonight. Mostly you shared about me. That there was always a level of vulnerability either about like me and what I'm going through or, and just you having you there to support me.
[00:49:12] and then, and then vice versa. Cause I remember you would come to me like during high school and we would talk about, relationships and boys and all of that and, you confided in me a lot of things. and so. In our foundational friendship, we've always been able to be vulnerable with each other and honest about these things.
[00:49:30] So that was helpful. And then when we, met again and we rekindled our friendship, it just seemed like. Let's, let's get deeper into that. And then at the same time, you were also going through a lot of things, like it was a very opening journey, like this beginning of this journey. And I was able to witness it and I was there, for some parts of it.
[00:49:51] And you share some of it with me and I felt like, you know what? We don't talk enough about this level of stuff. Like you and I, we talked about it because we're drunk sitting, on a couch between us girls, and I'm sure many girlfriends out there on their wine nights and they're like, happy hour.
[00:50:09] That's what we would talk about. You know, we would, we would share these deep, vulnerable thoughts and emotions and feelings with each other, and, and then that's it. You know, but we don't talk about it enough. And I feel like you and I would not hesitate to talk about these things, even if we're not with our closest friends.
[00:50:30] Right. You and I would be comfortable and talking about it in a very open environment. So basically what I'm saying is that. You and I have always been vulnerable with each other from the start, regardless of where we are at our friendship. And then we meet later again in life when you're in a vulnerable spot and, and yet, and then me seeing you going through that and then me reflecting on my own.
[00:50:54] Journey and my own challenges. I feel like, okay, not only do the both of us can, we support each other, but we should open up this conversation that we're having so that we can invite others to have similar conversations, whether in their own circles or even expanded outside. Because the more that we fucking normalize this, the easier it becomes and the less stigmatized any of this is.
[00:51:20] And I cannot think of another person in my life who would be as crazy . then you, I seriously cannot, I cannot, and not to discredit any of my close friends. It's just, you know, you're going to have to jump on a microphone with someone that you're close, but like, it's not like we're BFF since we were 15 and we're singing kumbaya together.
[00:51:44] It's like, we're gonna jump on a microphone and we're going to talk to the internet. And the whole goal is to create a movement so that more people can have these conversations, not as my goal. Going back to the first couple of questions, that is, my goal is to have more people have the level of conversations that you and I are having.
[00:52:05] Angie Yu: That's a fantastically put, and you put our mission basically in that blurb as well.
[00:52:11] Kristy Yee: and I'm sweating now, so that was a lot of energy,
[00:52:13] Angie Yu: but you articulate exactly why we're doing this really well. And I think that's for me answering the question is, that's exactly why I said yes, because you're such a passionate person.
[00:52:24] I don't know that many more people in my life that's as passionate as you are and and like, like you can just like, you're just so passionate about things and I love it and I love that energy that you bring. and I think we compliment each other really well in that regard as well, because I, I do tend to look at things from a more macro level, and I think.
[00:52:46] All the white, it's, it benefits me in a lot of creative ways. It's kind of a hindrance when I have to really get down to the details of it. And I feel like you're really good at that. Just kind of getting us to get shit done. And also, yeah, you're just your energy. Like I think your energy level matches and exceeds mine, so
[00:53:04] yeah. Okay. I think, you had one more question to go.
[00:53:07] Kristy Yee: Okay. Last thing. Again, . first thing that comes to mind. Just like fucking word vomit. Okay. Top six things that come to mind that represents you. N, G. U. Oh God.
[00:53:19] Angie Yu: Oh God.
[00:53:19] I hate these questions. okay, well, I think I'm very empathetic. I'm very self sufficient. and I'm very brave.
[00:53:27] But to me, like those three things that are generally seen as positive, I feel like there's another side to them too. So that's going to be my other three. I'm very empathetic, but it makes me sometimes lose control of my emotions. I mean, sorry, you can't lose control of your emotions. It makes me lose the control of my actions.
[00:53:45] That's a better way to do it cause I feel like everyone feels emotions anyway. But it's really what you do with your actions. Right. Sometimes I find it difficult to manage my actions because I'm so emotional.
[00:53:57] Kristy Yee: dang. That makes a lot of sense.
[00:53:58] And then a lot of like that, that resonated with me.
[00:54:01] Angie Yu: So the second thing being self sufficient, I think is great because everyone should be independent to a certain level. But I think sometimes it makes me feel like I don't need other people's help.
[00:54:12] Like, I feel like I can do it on my own or like I just don't ask for help and then if sometimes it cuts me off. Right.
[00:54:18] Kristy Yee: Or you don't recognize when you might need help. Exactly.
[00:54:22] Angie Yu: When sometimes people are happy to help, especially those people that love me. Right. Like my parents and my closest friends, people would love to help. . Sometimes I don't let people in. and then the third thing I said was brave. I'd like to think I'm brave. I think I will say things or do certain things that other people might not do or say.
[00:54:40] and that , doesn't bode well for me , especially in professional environments. especially environments where people are not ready to embrace different opinions. And if I present those different opinions, I'm sometimes seen as not cooperative.
[00:54:52] Yeah. what about you? What
[00:54:53] Kristy Yee: are your six okay, so first thing is I need to learn how to word my questions because here we go. Okay. Six things that come to mind that represents me. As a brand?
[00:55:06] Angie Yu: food.
[00:55:07] Kristy Yee: Cats. Mood. Okay. Harry Potter, music and singing in some way. Yeah, I think so.
[00:55:13] People like, associate that with me.
[00:55:16] Angie Yu: my answers are so fucking serious.
[00:55:18] Kristy Yee: And then , and then, and then independent, I think. Oh yeah. Okay. I think a lot of people would use that word to describe me. I would say, yeah. Whether it's a good thing or a bad thing, like that's, that's a whole different story.
[00:55:30] But I think, folks would generally use that type of words.
[00:55:34] Angie Yu: Yeah. Yeah. I agree.
[00:55:36] Kristy Yee: Yeah. Cat's number one.
[00:55:37] Angie Yu: I didn't know.
[00:55:41] Kristy Yee: Oh my God, I fucking love cats. I feel like in my mind, I love them so much that if I actually get a cat, it might just change my mind, but I've never said that to anybody and never out loud and never like even in my head until right now in this moment.
[00:55:54] When I grow up. My dream is to get a cat.
[00:55:57] Angie Yu: cat food, not cat food and food cat
[00:56:03] Kristy Yee: food.
[00:56:04] I love food so much that at one point, I wanted to go into culinary school. I wanted to open my own restaurant.
[00:56:10] I went into dietetics, which is the study of food and nutrition, like I wanted to know everything to do with food, whether it's preparing it or like, okay. I was going to say how to grow it, but I suck at that. But as part of university, I graduated from the faculty of land and food systems, like we learn about the land, we learn about agriculture, and we learn about the food systems, not just within our local food systems, but also national food system as well as global food systems.
[00:56:37] Angie Yu: Okay. Yeah. You do, you know, and do love food. Yeah.
[00:56:40] Kristy Yee: So like. I love food. I love food that I chose to study food, and I had a whole career, dedicated towards food. Yeah. Yeah. So. I try to justify the fact that I love food more than other people, but
[00:56:53] Angie Yu: that is
[00:56:54] Kristy Yee: like, you can't do that. But yeah, so food because of those things.
[00:56:58] Angie Yu: Wow. I mean, like our answers are so different. I love it. And I'm also like, am I too serious?
[00:57:03] Kristy Yee: maybe I'm just like not communicating cause what, what, how I interpret one thing, it came out totally different on the other side.
[00:57:13] Angie Yu: Oh, you know what? I misread as six words. I misheard it as, you
[00:57:17] Kristy Yee: know, I did say words I did because I, when I, when I saw, when I was like, Ooh, Tufts six things that could be like, Oh, you know, it could be like fucking paragraphs for each thing. So I was like, okay, just pick words. And when I said words, I wanted to say like keywords, like
[00:57:34] Angie Yu: cats, you know, music
[00:57:37] Kristy Yee: . Got to work on some of that literary. Conversation skills,
[00:57:41] Angie Yu: literary
[00:57:41] Kristy Yee: literary I know, I know because it's written,
[00:57:45] Angie Yu: you know, you could just say communication.
[00:57:48] Kristy Yee: Okay. I need to work on my communication skills. Let's wrap. Let's wrap it up. Let's wrap it up.
[00:57:53] Okay. So we asked each other with 10 questions a day. Got to know each other a little bit. Hopefully you guys got to know us
[00:57:59] Angie Yu: and that's it.
[00:58:00] Kristy Yee: And last thing, if y'alls would tell us which taboo subjects that you guys most look forward to listening about too.
[00:58:11] you guys can DM us on Instagram or leave us a comment in the podcast comment section, wherever that is.
[00:58:19] That'd be super dope. Cool, McCall.
[00:58:21] Angie Yu: Okay. All right. Bye.
[00:58:23] Kristy Yee: Bye.
[00:58:24] Angie Yu: On the next episode. We're going to kickoff our podcast by introducing Kristy's childhood story.
[00:58:35] Kristy Yee: Let's start from the beginning.
[00:58:36] Angie Yu: The origin stories. Her parents had sex.
[00:58:40] Kristy Yee: Oh God, no. Oh,
[00:58:43] we'll see you on the next
[00:58:43] episode.
